Rejected in 1995

I wanted to share some bullshit from a former life…. this is a real letter, it happened and yes… I most certainly have moved on and let it go…

I used to send out Valentines cards more back in the day. Valentines is a sore subject and a worthless, Hallmark day driven fully by capitalism and not worthy of the term “holiday”. On Feb. 1, 1995 I received a Sierra Club card from a some chick I was dating and sent her a V-card. Apparently I hadn’t spoken to her in some time and she hadn’t talked called me back in a while either… if you care:

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Austin-

Hey handsome. How’s it going? Well, thanks a lot for the valentine’s card. I really liked it. Listen, I’ve been meaning to talk to you for a while but I guess I just keep putting it off. Anyway, I have really enjoyed all the time we have spent together and I hope we will continue to go out and do stuff together. I guess I have just had too many problems lately and most of the time I don’t know how the hell to handle life in general. I don’t know why we stopped seeing each other there for awhile. I guess we do have completely different schedules and other things to concentrate on so we just didn’t get the chance. I know we both deserve a second chance. Like starting our relationship over again and I would love to but I’m seeing someone else at the moment.

Listen, I’m not trying to dog you and I’m not trying to be a bitch. Please don’t hate me! Fuck. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. This is hard for me because I still want to see you but I’ve already made a commitment to someone else. I really don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to do or say so please don’t be mad at me. I’m not just trying to throw you a shitty line but I really want to stay friends and stay in touch.

If you don’t have any plans this weekend, I wold love to go out with you. I know we would still have a good time. I apologize if I lead you on in any way or I have hurt your feelings in any way. Please understand that I really want to be friends still. I still want to spend time with you too. Mabye Saturday night we could go shoot some pool or see a movie or something. This tim it will be my treat =)

Listen, I really do believe you deserve someone better than me. I think that whoever that person is, they know how lucky they are to have a special guy like you.

Please promise me we’ll keep in touch and that you will always stay handsome. Once again, I hope you understand. Always XXXX

P.S. Call me and we’ll go out!

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I don’t know why I still have this. I think I kept it as a memory of things to come… Actually the separation was probably more my fault. I had usually a case of A.D.D. with my sports schedules, friends (priority over women) and the people I dated (which typically came third). I know at it wasn’t the sex well because I never had any with this girl… now I come to think about it, that was probably the problem! I do know that the guy she spoke of about dating in this letter, did have sex with her and as a consequence got her knocked up – of course he’s a bastard child now as he’s gone to college by now. Ah well I wish her well and hope it all worked out for her. I’m VERY happy for the situation I am in! Comment le parc va-t-il en ?t?

Wouldn’t We All Like to be Money Rounders Pulling Fredos?

So two things seem to come up more offer than most in my post work discussions. Money and Women. They both are evil, can corrupt even the strongest of men and in the world of today, the more of them you have, they really just bring more problems than solutions. Well the last one holds more true for women more than money…But alas I cannot take my damn hands off either of em. So I’ve come up with a few simple rules of wisdom, with the help of the Swingers, that can help you get both in life without too many headaches:

#1 There are No Rules in This Game. Believe it or not being genuine is much more refreshing and will get you a lot farther than bullshit.
#2 Team Play. Didn’t kindergarten teach you anything? Work together, and have fun. You’ll get more accomplished with better results. “Where’s my wingman?”
#3 Less is More. It’s not about what you say. It’s how you listen.
#4 Women Aren’t Dumb. The B side is: Money is not easy. Manipulation should be subtle and insults get you NO WHERE.
#5 Be Honest… with yourself and with your dealings. Get straight to the point. If you want the sale ask for it. Don’t be interested in the brand name when you both know you want to see the pants on the floor in your bedroom.
#6 If You Must Lie. Keep it simple and as close to the truth as possible. Lying is bad business but in some personal settings it’s needed to smoothes things over.
#7 Setting the tone. Be confident and comfortable with who and what you have. It’s attractive and presents superiority that most lack. Never apologize for anything. Focus on the benefits not the negatives.
#8 Timing is Everything. If you are pushy or early you look desperate. Be patient and casual. There’s nothing like a good entrance.
#9 Deer in the Headlights. Everyone wants a mystery. Keep it a challenge and drive the needs rather than the wants.
#10 The Law of the Jungle. The strongest will survive. The competition is fierce so always give yourself the edge. A sense of self-respect makes all the difference in the world.
#11 Never bring up old shit. Never bring up ex-boyfriends, partners, encounters or old (sour) news. It will never benefit you and you don’t need to know.
#12 Be a Bad Man. My boys and I call this Owning. Don’t hide the fact that you like sex. We aren’t 14 man. Own your sexuality and don’t apologize for it. On the money side: You want it right. Go after it!
#13 The Waiting Game. The deal goes sour without foreplay. The babies love that shit. No reason to pop off in the first round when you know it’s scheduled for 10. Again don’t be desperate and take your time boy!
#14 Grace Under Pressure. The golden rule is keep it simple. Don’t try to over explain who you are or how you’re feeling (what you are selling). In leaving a message, remind them of something shared, don’t expect them to remember you by voice and name alone.
#15 Skip the Birdseed. Sometimes it just happens. Close the deal then and there. Don’t try to over sell your position when it’s all working now.
#16 Trust Yourself. Play your game not someone else’s. Stick with what feels right. Even if you fail, you’ve learned something and use it to better yourself the next pull.

And because I’m focusing on Money and Women, well what better way to have both than with a trip to Las Vegas. Yup. I’ve booked the flight to the city of sin and next comes the love, but don’t expect me to drop money at the Chicken ranch. The next episode I’ll come with some related links…