What’s a DJ?

As someone who’s played music to a crowd live, in the living room or in a club this comes up not as often as it once has. A DJ has become synonymous with nightlife but really not may people notice mediocre DJs just really bad ones or really good ones (and there are many of the former). I have a shirt I wear sometimes and for those that don’t get a chance to read it:

DJ (dee-jay) I. n.: a retarded individual who receives undue credit, extravagant amounts of money, fame, recognition and sexual favors in return for playing music created by other people. 2. a moron who plays records at volume levels which prohibit coherent thought while you are attempting to have a conversation at the bar. 3. an arrogant idiot adored by countless lobotomy cases who attribute this ability to talent (sic.). 4. a legitimate argument for mandatory sterilization. 5. a first class parasite with delusions of grandeur who inexplicably makes a living by leeching off the talented individuals who have actually bothered to the hard work involved in creating individual music. 6. I really wish they would all fuck off and die.

In reality there are many fucktards that buy a pair of ipods, or a Mac computer, download some MP3s and play it over a loud system – then claim themselves to be DJs. Just because you push play does not mean you know anything about rhythm, style, flow, focus and moving the crowd. Even some good DJs have let their skills go because the standards of a DJ have slipped so far. I find this despicable and coupled with the decline in focus of the club scene from the Music to selling bottles to douchebags, the nightlife scene has forever failed to live up to it’s heyday in the early 90s.